A Time to Mourn Posted by Ashleigh Slater on May 3, 2009

Back in February, I was hard at work scheduling articles for the month of May on Ungrind. Aware that Mother's Day fell in May, I knew I wanted to include an article or two for moms.

It was during this time that I came across a blog post by popular blogger, MckMama, called "I Will Never Forget." It moved me to tears.

In it, she thinks back to the devastating news she received that her unborn son would die.

This past summer, I shared my thoughts on becoming one of them. This was a club I never would have planned to join, for in this club belonged mothers who learned they would not be able to keep their babies on this side of eternity. When we were told that our sweet Stellan would not make it into our arms alive, I became one of them. I unwillingly joined that club and, at first, I went kicking and screaming.

MckMama continues, reflecting on the miracle she and her husband received: Stellan lived. She then shares her heart for moms who have suffered the death of a baby.

Have I known the anguish of being told my baby will surely die? Yes. Do I know the unimaginable pain of stepping back and watching God actually usher my child into Heaven? No! There are dark corners of this club I have never seen. I am not fully one of them. Yet, because of our journey, I have a indescribably soft, painfully raw place in my heart for women who have seen those dark corners that otherwise would not exist in me.

It was then that I realized the desire to offer articles for these moms. The moms who find Mother's Day difficult because with it comes the grief of missing a dearly loved baby.

This week we these articles. The first is a review of Jenny Schroedel's latest book, Naming the Child: Hope-filled Reflections on Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Death. In it, I look at how Schroedel's book encourages parents to take the time to mourn.

The second, "Cherishing Every Moment of Life," is a piece on perinatal hospice. Lynette Kittle shares the purpose of these organizations and interviews those who have either started a perinatal hospice or benefited from their services.

After you've read both pieces, come back here and discuss. Share your thoughts and your own stories.

Comments

[Danielle]

Thanks for the review, Ashleigh. Beautifully and sensitively written.

[Rachael]

"After a child is born, families are also encouraged to care for, hold, dress, take photos of, and create keepsakes of their infant."

--Neat!! How blessed are the babies who can receive such loving care!

--I am reminded that several years ago I learned about anencephaly when writing a paper about it for a community college class. I don't remember exactly what I wrote, but I must have been advocating life.

[alison]

Beautiful article, Ashleigh. Thank you for sharing such a precious story and issue.

[Leanne]

Needed this today. Thank you.